Wednesday, August 17, 2011

I have been listening to a shit-ass ton of metal lately thanks to my friend Ben and thanks to feeling some kind of helplessly depressed as I watched my girlfriend purchase her plane ticket to move back to Ohio after living with her and sleeping next to her for a long time. I dropped her off at the airport; I shook. Here is a list of shit I really like in no real order. I'm going to link to songs via Spotify. Hopefully you have Spotify.

Weedeater - This band is sludgy as fuck and has some song titles that make me feel itchy like the end of this summer does. Favorites include "God Luck and Good Speed" from their self-titled album and "Turkey Warlock" from the album Jason the Dragon.

Neurosis - They are playing in Portland next Saturday and I'm going to be somewhere in the crowd trying to get my ears to just fucking bleed already. In particular, I've been listening to the albums The Eye of Every Storm and Given to Rising. Good shit. Very musical and sad but angry. Their Wikipedia entry says that some critic has described them as "atmospheric hardcore," but I would maybe pull the hardcore tag. I would maybe say "wandering spacecore." I'll always be the first to pull the hardcore tag.

Burzum - The album Det som engang var has been blowing my mind. Fucking destroys all your nice feelings but also has some interesting melodies that make you want to just kind of get off your ass and do something important that involves a bill you can't neglect or someone will come and get you. The music reminds you that there is always someone who is ready to come and get you. The dude from this band, Varg Vikernes a.k.a. Count Grishnackh, was in the band Mayhem. He burned down a shit ton of churches and murdered one of the other dudes in Mayhem by stabbing him. He finished a 16-year prison sentence in 2009. Burzum is his solo project. For more on crazy Norwegian black metal, watch the film Until the Light Takes Us.

Earth - Okay, this isn't really metal. Or maybe it is. Earth shares some of the qualities of these other bands that really make me like the music. I highly recommend The Bees Made Honey in the Lion's Skull. This music is like pre-metal or something. Heavy, ambient, drugged-out stuff. About as soporific as anything approaching metal can be, but that isn't a bad thing here.

Wolves in the Throne Room - I stumbled across this band last month. Pacific Northwest black metal. This is what happens when vegans from Olympia listen to way too much Darkthrone. This duo has a moldy sound to them that conjures the misty violence of the PacNW. Let's not forget this place is the home to some of the craftiest serial killers in American history. If you listen close, you can hear them breathing a little of that same musty air as Bundy or the Green River Killer. In particular, I'm fond of Diadem of 12 Stars.

Electric Wizard - This band sounds like a contemporary reimagining of early Pentagram (not as obvious as maybe Witchcraft) but you can also hear early Sabbath in the vocals if you listen close enough. But take away any and all clarity to the vocals. There are new ways to make hell noises in the 2000s. All fair and expected since we have new hells or at least updated hells. Electric Wizard makes some very dense, tuned-down metal that has at least some kind of nod to their predecessors. Listen to the albums Dopethrone and Black Masses.

Dead Meadow - Psychedelia + heaviness are pretty much where I am at right now. Dead Meadow is not by any means traditional "metal," but they still manage to bring the brutality in measured doses. I'm pretty sure the drummer has a shitty little drum kit and manages to make awesome sounds come out of it. I saw them this spring and I remember him looking like a Montessori pre-school escapee. If you can't get into Dead Meadow, then I pretty much don't want to talk to you. Listen to "Ain't Got Nothing (To Go Wrong)" or "Greensky Greenlake."

Mastodon - Every album I've listened to by this band has crushed. I have been listening to them since I was doing my undergrad, and I am excited to get my hands on their new album The Hunter. The newly released single, "Curl of the Burl," is interesting. It's a shift from the face melters on some of their past albums in favor of some drive-y QOTSA or Kyuss-style riffs. I don't want to say "accessible," but maybe. The new album art will probably give me nightmares at some point. I just bought tickets to see them in Portland in November. All I want to do is go to metal shows and blow kisses at junkies.

Zoroaster - This band played with Weedeater in like May or something. I remember thinking that it was still winter because summer & Portland are two things that feel weird thinking about together. It felt like we were in some kind of backwardsness where water just kept falling to torture us. When I think about what winter is like, it makes sense that she would leave me and this city, I guess. Okay. Zoroaster's vocals have a shit-ton of reverb which makes them feel like a demon priest reciting John Berryman. Listen for yourself.

Sleep - The album Sleep's Holy Mountain is kind of a holy grail. This is something I didn't really know until last year because I'm really fucking slow at keeping up with holy grails. This album will wake you up. I like to listen to it on my way to work in the morning and pretend I'm not going to a corporate job in a high rise in the city. I like to pretend I'm off to die fighting Yeti just like my forefathers and this is album is a document of my Yeti-fighting failures. But ultimately I just park my car and buy shitty coffee and slide up the building's ass in a suppository that looks like an elevator over and over.

I just need this shit right now, I guess. Leave suggestions in the comments, if you want.

Monday, July 18, 2011

Reading - Saturday, July 23rd

I've been awful about keeping this blog updated w/ events. Starting fresh for the summer:

Saturday, July 23rd
4:00 pm - 6-ish

Four Denver poets are coming to Portland to say hi, read poems! Please come out to listen and welcome them!

Coffee and beer provided, donations appreciated!

Serena Chopra has recently been published in the Denver Quarterly, Fact-Simile, and Pax Americana. She has upcoming publications in VOLT and The Laurel Review. Her chapbook, Speaking to Your Man, was released in August 2010 by Peninsulas Now Press. In 2010, she was the finalist in the Black Ocean Press book contest, the Kundiman Poetry Prize with Alice James books, the Undefined Magazine poetry competition, and The Midwestern Chapbook Series, judged by G.C.Waldrep. She is a 2010 Kundiman fellow, a former intern for The New Press in New York City, and works with Writers in the Schools to teach creative writing to Denver elementary school children. Serena is the co-founder and curator for TitMouse Magazine, and the co-editor of Spine Road. She lives and works in Denver.

Michael Flatt's work has appeared most recently in Horse Less Press and 32 Poems. His reviews of poetry and fiction appear regularly at and he has an article forthcoming in Samuel Beckett Today/Aujourd'hui. He is also an associate editor for Counterpath Press.

Mark Rockswold teaches English at the community college of Denver. His work has appeared in the Blue Earth review, Tarpaulin sky, the Electronic Literary Directory and elsewhere. He is the co-founder and publisher of SpringGun Press, a biannual journal of quality poetry, flash fiction, interdisciplinary digital art/electronic literature, book reviews, essays, interviews, chapbooks, and soon---full length poetry books.

Daniel George McDonald holds a BA in English from the university of Colorado and will be seeking an MFA in creative writing from Columbia University starting in the fall. He remains utterly, unremittingly unpublished.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Monday, January 24, 2011

Book trailer

Here's a book trailer I made with co-conspirator Brian David Smith for Jamie Iredell's new book The Book of Freaks.

Friday, January 14, 2011

Some spam someone tried to post on my dad's website

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Friday, December 10, 2010

Some Updates, Plans

It has been a pretty mild fall/start of winter here in Portland. So far, we've had some days that felt like drowning, but not like last year.

This is what it looks like out my office window right now.

Okay, it's not "my office," it's a shared office.

So here are some things I'm doing very soon:

1.) This Sunday Caroline and I are leaving for Columbus, OH, where we'll spend Christmas. It's a "meet the parents" situation. Also, I've never been farther east than th
e Dallas-Fort Worth airport. I'm told it will basically be a tour of her favorite chain restaurants. (Stay tuned, I'll probably be blogging our outings to Cracker Barrel and Waffle House.) I told her there's no way in hell I'm going to this place. Do you see that? That's chili over spaghetti noodles. That's unforgivable. She claims she doesn't like that restaurant, but we'll see.

2.) I am working on an exciting project with several friends. We are starting a design/marketing/writing/editing company called Mammoth Creative Group. The site should be fully functional after the 1st of the year. Another exciting bit of news: I'm starting a small press attached to the company, tentatively named "Mammoth Editions." First title is in the pipeline, more on that later. For now it's a secret. Stay out of my shit, Julian Assange.

3.) We have a kitten. His name is Felix, and he wakes me up in the middle of the night by biting
my back or other parts of my body. Last night I thought about boiling him. Just kidding, he is awesome.

4.) I'll be done with my master's degree in the spring. Not sure what the next step is, but I'm thinking about banging on Wieden+Kennedy's door. Aim high, right?

6.) Santa, I have been mostly nice this year. Mostly nice to myself, but periods of niceness to others as well.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Poetry Readings This Week - 12/1 & 12/7

A couple of upcoming poetry events:

Tomorrow, 12/1 7:30-9:00

Things happening at this event include:
  • Internationally acclaimed whistler and magician Mitch Hider is collaborating with Kaia Sand to tell a tale of financial fiasco
  • Installation projects by Jennifer Hardacker (Sheltered—a video) and David Buuck (“Matta Clark Park Series”—a poster project)
  • Come early for the Right 2 Survive craft fair starting at 6PM

An Event of Poetry, Art, & Music at Switchyard Studios

George Rachel, James Gendron, Michael Roberts
plus music & art (tba)

Tuesday, December 7
7:30 pm


Also, I'd like to invite anyone hosting any poetry (and I use the term "poetry" very loosely here) event in Portland to e-mail me at bryancoffelt (at) gmail (dot) com and I'll try to get the event up on this blog. So excited about the things that have been happening around here lately.

Friday, November 19, 2010

Vids from Summer Reading @ Ampersand

Videos from a reading I did this summer with Emily Kendal Frey and Evelyn Hampton.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Poetry Readings This Weekend - 11/19

Friday, November 19 · 7:00pm - 10:00pm


Rodney Koeneke will also be reading tonight. Yet another reason to get up in this.


Mingling hour at 7. Reading starts at 8. With a donation of any amount, you will receive a limited edition hand-bound Bad Blood chapbook of Brandon Downing's poems.

BRANDON DOWNING is a photographer, collagist, filmmaker and poet. A longtime member of the Flarf Collective, his books include Lake Antiquity: Poems 1996-2008 (Fence, 2009), The Shirt Weapon (Germ Monographs, 2002), and Dark Brandon (Faux Press, 2005). A feature-length collection of his short films, Dark Brandon: Eternal Classics, was released on DVD in 2007, with a further installment expected in 2010. Photographic work can be seen at, while recent video projects can often be found at He lives in New York City.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Poetry Readings This Weekend - 11/12 & 11/14

Switchyard Studios presents: "The Switch"

Friday, November 12 · 7:30pm - 10:00pm

Switchyard Studios, 109 SE Salmon St., Portland, OR
Emily Kendal Frey
Sarah Bartlett
Dean Gorman

Tara Williamson

Krislyn Dillard
Lindsay De Armond!


Sunday, November 14 7:30 pm - ?

The Waypost, 3120 N. Williams Ave., 503-367-3182

Amina Cain
Jennifer Calkins
Doug Nufer
Pam Ore
Mathew Timmons
Christine Wertheim

$5 suggested donation

Friday, November 5, 2010

Poetry Readings This Weekend - 11/6 & 11/7

"Tangent is pleased to host a cross-genre reading of fiction, poetry, and non-fiction on SATURDAY, 6 November at 7 PM. Portland-based writer and editor KEVIN SAMPSELL will be joined by Southern California writers K. LORRAINE GRAHAM and MARK WALLACE. The event will take place at the Open Space Café in Southeast Portland (2815 SE Holgate).

Tangent presents:
Open Space Cafe, 2815 SE Holgate (corner of SE Holgate & 28th Ave) Portland, (503) 233-6736
Admission is free.

KEVIN SAMPSELL is the author of the short story collections, Beautiful Blemish and Creamy Bullets. His newest book is the memoir, A Common Pornography. He has been the publisher of Future Tense Books, a micropress, since 1990.

K. LORRAINE GRAHAM is the author of Terminal Humming (Edge Books), and her visual work has appeared in the Zaoem International Poetry Exhibition at the Minardschouwburg, Gent, Belgium, and the Infusoria visual poetry exhibition in Brussels. She lives in Carlsbad, CA, with her partner Mark Wallace and Lester Young, a pacific parrotlet. You can find her online at

MARK WALLACE is the author of more than fifteen books and chapbooks of poetry, fiction, and essays. Temporary Worker Rides A Subway won the 2002 Gertrude Stein Poetry Award and was published by Green Integer Books. His critical articles and reviews have appeared in numerous publications, and he has co-edited two essay collections, Telling It Slant: Avant Garde Poetics of the 1990s, and A Poetics of Criticism. Most recently he has published a short story collection, Walking Dreams (2007), and a book of poems, Felonies of Illusion (2008). Forthcoming in early 2011 is his second novel, The Quarry and The Lot. He teaches at California State University San Marcos."

Sunday, November 7
7:30 pm

The Waypost
3120 N. Williams Ave.

$5 suggested donation

Lewis Warsh's most recent books are A Place in the Sun (Spuyten Duyvil, 2010) and Inseparable: Poems 1995-2005 (Granary, 2008). He is editor and publisher of United Artists Books and director of the MFA program in creative writing at Long Island University in Brooklyn.

Alicia Cohen is a poet and literary scholar who lives in Portland, Oregon. Her recent book Debts and Obligations was published by O Books; her first book Bear was published by Handwritten Press. She has taught at Portland State University and Reed College.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Entertainment for People 10/10/10 RECAP

Last night's "Entertainment For People" was awesome, and if you missed it, you kind of suck. But here's a recap and a few vids to tide you over until the next one. Host/poet/musician Derrick Brown kept everyone on their toes with (sometimes) ad libbed lyrics, poems, (one of which included the lines "I don't care if you made that dress, hippie / I'll shred it") and his generally hilarious wit.

Author Steve Almond read from his new book Rock and Roll Will Save Your Life as well as parts of his self-published book Letters From People Who Hate Me. Highlights include a section of the new book wherein Steve admits to lathering deodorant on his "junk," hate mail from someone who claims they've submitted Steve's name for rectal research, and un-ironic Air Supply.

My girlfriend and I helped pass out delicious cupcakes from St. Cupcake. (I gave one to Steve, though my girlfriend claims she was the one who gave him the cupcake. I refuse to bicker over something so silly as giving one of my favorite authors a cupcake, but between you and I, dear readers, my cupcake tray was the winner).

Filmmaker Scott Kravitz told a story about his bread maker. It was sad, and I felt like he was telling a story about a lost love. After realizing he never actually eats any of the bread he makes, and that he actually doesn't know how to make bread (mix ingredients, press start on bread maker), Kravitz decides it's time to end things with the bread maker. "I gave the bread maker away," he said, "we parted ways as friends." I wonder what happened to all the bread makers in the world. Do people still have them in their basements, sitting unopened in the boxes they left Target in? Or is there a large underground bread maker repository somewhere? Do people still use bread makers?

Beth Lisick busted out her list of 68 Things That Make [Beth Lisick] Cringe. Audience members then shouted out numbers, and Beth described the terrible things that made her cringe in one minute or less. I think this is something that should be required of every human being.

B. Frayn Masters (writer and proprietor of - a dating site for people who want to date cats) read some of the work she has done for an unnamed semi-pornographic magazine. Beth Lisick commented that it was confusing and very avant garde. Here are a few of my favorite phrases from the pieces she read:

"Generous titties."

"An awesome sting of naughtiness."

"If you don't know who the fuck Anais Nin is, all you need to know is that she's French."

"Maximum turn-on outfit."

Here's a video of Derrick Brown singing one of his songs:

Sunday, October 3, 2010

This Is Why.

I'm not the first person to say this, and I won't be the last. I resent Existence. I resent being put in this suffering sack. How could you not be hateful? It's imperfect, and all we do is "strive for perfection"; but it's not gonna be snagged. I promise. Perfection is Nothing. It's funny, right? That my politics/personal statement/letter of intent is based on Nothing? A promotion of Nothing As Perfection?

I am Bryan Coffelt, and I approve Nothing.

And Existing (blahblahblah) makes other people suffer. You meet people, people love you, they lament your death. Or you meet people, you are an insufferable asshole, they love you anyway, they still lament your death. That's all we do; we mourn for each other before we're even dead. All we do is mourn.

I'm just fucking pissed. I Hate that I Exist and Love and Will Lose You All/Will Be Lost.

I'm not going to kill myself, obvs. Sunrises and shit, and obv. don't want to contribute to aforementioned mourning. But I'm just saying — life is just little spots of happiness surrounded by a bunch of fucking bullshit. It's one unbearable boner after another unbearable boner. If I have to Exist, and Existing is so imperfect, why can't I just be a fucking cat? Why can't I lick my own ass and feign contentment? Why can't I at least be furry and purr?


Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Chapbook Update

All chapbooks have shipped. Those who waited longest have extra surprises (either a drawing, a collage, or something else). Thanks again.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Held in place by abstract concepts.

Credit card debt seems tangible.
"Being successful" has diminished value.
"Surviving" has increased value.
Why can't we just walk away from debt?
What is a "credit score"?
Perfect credit is worthless.
Shitty credit is worthless.
Mediocre credit is priceless.
Mediocrity is priceless.
The New Capitalism depends on the illusion of higher education.
No one makes anything.
You can not make $30 last a whole week.
There are robocalls.
Physical nudging of cellphone vibrating.
Credit card companies are actually rattling my leg every few hours.
Actually shaking me.
Physically assaulting me.
Email makes my leg vibrate.
Phone calls make my leg vibrate.
Twitter makes my leg vibrate.
Facebook makes my leg vibrate.
Instant messages make my leg vibrate.
Everything is privatized.
What does "privatize" mean?


To all you people who have been waiting patiently for me to send you copies of The Whatever Poems:

I finally scraped together some cash to get a few printed and will be sending them shortly. My sincere apologies to those of you who have been waiting the longest.

They are coming! For real.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Google Scribe

I am playing with Google Scribe.

Here is something I made by picking words/phrases until it stopped offering me suggestions:

Today i was added to the group of automorphisms which are not available for purchase online via our encrypted connection prevents monitoring of blood glucose is above the law because it is known today about membership, which includes biography, discography, concerts and festivals across the country including California and New Mexico State University Aggies Officially Licensed NFL Wireless Controller Twin Pack Case Set-Up Fees, Dedicated Phone Number for Life Insurance and annuities are issued to you by CBS Television Stations Digital Object Identifier nothing to do with their lives and how they work together towards a common objective of the game forever and ever amen randy travis barker remix mp3 download free new mp3 comedy videos watch for FREE gianna.